Honk if you still read this blog

I am weary.

Matt and I got new phones and so I have taken to using my phone to read e-mails and Facebook, occasionally write e-mails and post on Facebook, and occasionally read blogs. It is so much easier to do that while nursing on the couch, than to use the desktop computer for anything else at any other time.

I decided to take a few minutes and post because I feel a little bad that I'm not documenting any of my life lately and it's such a nice, blurry, weary time of life. Except, should I document how much I resemble Godzilla on nights when Matt is not home before the kids go to bed? Sometimes I think my kids have it great. Other times I feel really bad for them. Godzilla Time is one of those times.

I don't always think straight at night lately. Lars hasn't been sleeping too great for a few weeks now. I get so frustrated in the middle of the night and sometimes hide my head under my pillow. I remember once when Theo was a baby and crying, our friend Sterling said, "Well, at least you know he's breathing!" I like to remember that, when I think I can't stand the crying. Optimism! Besides, Lars is mellow most of the time. I mean, he cries, but he's not inconsolable. And he is even mellow during the night, comparatively--he's crying but he's not screaming or anything. Mostly he just is indifferent to the whole prisoner-of-war torture vibe that he is giving us with such short stretches of sleep.

It's especially frustrating during those sleepy dark hours because I feel like I am doing everything I'm "supposed" to do to encourage him towards good nighttime sleep. (He's only 6 weeks old but that's old enough for a couple of 4-hour stretches in a row which at the moment sounds great.) He wakes up at the same time every morning, nurses at regular intervals 8-10 times a day, takes good naps, is alert and happy during the day, has lots of mom time, brother and sister time, alone time, swing time, carseat time, sling time, bassinet time, snuggling time, lie down on a blanket and stare time. Maybe he's too happy during the day. Maybe I should let him let off more steam. He really doesn't seem hungry at night, just fussy. What more do you want from me, Ezzo and Bucknam? What More Do You Want?? OK, maybe I could cut back on the dairy. But otherwise...

Anyway I just loaded a bunch of pictures from this summer so I'm going to post them a little at a time. Probably I'll post-date them all now since Elmo's World is on. Don't stay away forever, blog readers. I'll be back for real someday. Life is good, just a little chaotic at times, or a lot chaotic at times.