Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Lips

Remember the movie Cast Away, where Tom Hanks’s lips get so unbelievably, disgustingly cracked and bleeding and dry and layered and brown after living alone on a desert island for 4 years with nary a Chap Stick in sight, that the obscenity of it all just makes you want to vomit? Well, picture those lips on my face.

I’m a person who really takes care of my lips—I mean I’m extremely compulsive when it comes to lip balm. I’ve got Chap Stick, Vaseline, Blistex, Softlips, Candy Kisses, Gap Chap, those deodorant-sized Bath & Body works chapsticks, you name it--stashed in the car, in my desk at work, in my nightstand drawer, in Matt’s nightstand drawer, in the bathroom drawer, in my jewelry box, my pocket, my purse, my coat, my backpack. But for some reason, for the past few days, my lips have gotten out-of-control chapped. I guess it’s a winter thing, but this is my 5th Utah winter and I haven’t had a problem yet. Until now. January 2005.

OK, so it’s not really that bad. In fact, the unruly condition of my lips is not actually very visible to the naked eye, unless you get REALLY close.

But it feels that bad.