Here I am

**Note for the Anxious: this photo is 13 years old; I’m not in the hospital.** Apropos of nothing (other than the coincidence/pun situation of it being Labor Day) I was looking at these snapshots taken at some of my most vulnerable times (2007, 2008, 2011, 2015). 

All of my kids’ births were so different, but they were progressively better experiences. I knew more each time, and I think most of all I was more willing to be vulnerable each time and truly let go of how I thought I was “supposed” to act. With Theo I was hyper-aware and rigid. With Ida I let go a little more. With Lars I blocked out everything and everyone around me. By the time I had Polly, I was like “whewwww here I am world!!! Like it or not!!!”

🎢🎪🎡 

Anyway I have been thinking about the confidence that’s required to be truly vulnerable, and how that’s sort of ironic. Also how anxiety interferes with the flow (in my case, I am confident ➡️ and then I am vulnerable ➡️ and THEN I get anxious afterward 🔁 when it’s too late to stay in my shell and hide my true feelings. I feel that a time machine would be so useful for the socially anxious). Does this even make any sense? 🤔 Whewwww here I am world! 

(And then she turned motivational) It’s a new school year. Be you. Be the gift to the world that is the true and unapologetic YOU. Here we go! 🎢