Baby Lars

Here he is!

He's pretty much been asleep since he was born, so we don't have a good eyes-open picture yet. You can't really tell from this picture but he is blond and has more hair than Ida did, although less hair than Theo did.

I started typing out Lars's birth story and realized I wanted to include way more detail than I feel like writing at the moment. So here is the abbreviated version and I'll write more later. Maybe.

Officially, I started active labor at around 5:30 p.m. on Sunday. Unofficially I woke up at 6 a.m. that day with painful and random contractions that were anywhere from 5 to 20 minutes apart throughout the day. I made it through stake conference and directing the Primary choir and tried to rest afterward. Hannah and Robbie were coming over for dinner and I warned them noncommittally that I had been having irregular contractions but didn't especially expect anything to happen, at least I didn't dare to expect that out loud.

By the time they arrived, the contractions were harder to talk through and getting closer together. By 4:30 they were 10 minutes apart and by 5:30 they were 5 minutes apart. I sat down to dinner with everyone and every 5 minutes went into Ida's room to cope with the contractions. Once we realized this was turning into something, Matt called our doula, Nicole, and we headed upstairs to our room while Hannah and Robbie took care of Theo and Ida.

Over the next couple of hours my contractions became just about unbearable. I needed both Matt and Nicole next to me at all times or I freaked out. Contractions started doubling up and I would have 2, or even 3, minute-long contractions in a row. Nicole, who is also a home-birth midwife as well as a doula, checked my cervix just before we decided to go to the hospital (and I secretly decided to get an epidural) and I was only at a 5. This was very disappointing news to me. Even more disappointing was the fact that my doctor was at a family event in Fredericksburg and no one could get ahold of him. I called my old doctor (who had delivered Ida) just to see if he was on call--he was not. We left a little before 9.

The ride to the hospital was 30 minutes (felt much longer than that) and I could feel the baby moving down with each contraction. We checked into the hospital at 9:30 p.m. and I had progressed from 5 to 9 centimeters during the ride. I wanted to cry and kiss everyone. My doctor arrived right when I started pushing, which, unfortunately, was a much less pleasant experience than it had been with Ida. I remember with Ida's labor that pushing felt great and productive. This time I couldn't find a position that felt right (although--hooray for a doctor who didn't break down the bed, and said I could push however I wanted) and I still didn't get past 9 centimeters even when my water broke on the first real push. But my doctor promised that I could push past the cervical lip anyway, so I went for it. Lars was out in maybe, I don't know, 20 minutes.

You are probably laughing to yourself, "That's the abbreviated version?" Yeah, I have a much longer and more detailed version in my head that maybe I will get around to writing down someday. It includes the fact that the doctor asked Matt, "Do you want to deliver the baby yourself?" and once Lars's head was out, Matt grabbed him by the armpits, pulled him out, and handed him to me himself. That was very cool. I looked and announced, "It's a boy!" and the doctor let the cord stay attached until it stopped pulsing before Matt cut it. It also includes other impressions about the preceding week and my doctor and my doula and the nurses and what it felt like to have "only" 5 hours of hard labor versus "only" 12. I actually think I might take 12 over 5. At least I got more breaks that way.

This picture makes me laugh so hard because it is so, so unflattering. (love the running mascara) This is what childbirth looks like on me. That is the only picture I am remotely willing to post and that should tell you something.

This pregnancy and this labor were unfortunately marked by a lot of fear and anxiety on my part. Although I had had a natural birth before, I didn't feel very confident and I often wondered about what could go wrong. I spent hours and hours deciding on a doula and a doctor. I cried a few times during this labor and wondered whether I could do it. Even when I had 4 people standing next to me telling me the baby would be out in "one more push" I didn't believe any of them. But they were right.

I am so glad that Lars arrived safely and so glad that Theo and Ida love him already--they were so cute with him when they came to visit today. I'm so glad the timing worked out perfectly to have Hannah and Robbie stay with the kids. I'm so glad I have had 2 VBACs. I'm so glad I decided at 35 weeks to switch doctors and hospitals. I'm so glad we hired our wonderful doula. I'm so glad I married Matt. I'm so glad we have been blessed in ways we never could have even anticipated.